Friday, May 8, 2009

It's decided

ll the waiting and moving are over (as fas as I know;-). I came to Skilcare Nursing Center to wait while the paperwork was being completed at Craighead Nursing Home, where I had what was the room of choice. I came by ambulance Tuesday night from St. Bernard's Hospital - or thanks to Medicare, pay $900 per day - to Skilcare.

How many feelings can one experience at the same time? I once had a list of feelings; I wish I had it then. They were magnified when I got into my bed to find it broken. The head of the bed could not be raised. I had to lie flat. Flat as a board.

I had thought about getting something for pain before I left the hospital, but failed to say something. Bad choice! The presciption for my pain med could not be filled until morning, and the pharmacy would have to deliver it. That meant all night long without any relief. Oh, boy. This was going to be interesting.

Jim had an interesting time before him, too. He was exhausted. The day had been looong, and tiring as we waited and waited on things to be done - hello Dr. Osborne ;-) - but it was necessary to see her before we left the hospital. She is SO great for explaining everything.....and..putting me at ease. It took every ounce of strength for him to bring my stuff inside, and then head for Blytheville. I was so concerned for him to be driving that road in that condition, but he promised he'd pull over if he got too tired/sleepy. What a relief when he text me he'd made it home!

Back here at the ranch I decided to use sleep to get throuh the painful night while waiting for the morning of relief. I think I only woke once, and used relaxation techniques to go back to sleep until the moring light brought on the new day, and hope for relief from the moster that envelped me.

Another wait began. A written prescription was needed to be delivered to the pharmacy before it could be delivered here. No problem. Before noon surely. I've learned you can endure things in short spurts usually, so that is how I embraced the morning.

Lunch came and went. Nothing. So, we began the afternoon vigil. Crying and sobbing tears of pain. Through it all, at one point I just wanted to go home.....anywhere. About four or so Jim did have to go home, and as he did, he stopped at the nurses station to check on the status of my prescription. The nurse said she would follow up with the pharmacy and doctor's office. Moments later he came back with news that it was going to be delivered to the nursing home between 6:00 and 6:30. Only a couple of hours. That's doable.

The magic hour.....7:15 p.m.! Praise God for perc! I had a sweet, restful night's sleep then. Come Thursday morning. Not pain-free, but under pain control, I got dressed in real clothes, and......ta dah.....went from bed to my chair.

LIFE flowed throughout me like I cannot explain. No, no words were with me to explain what I felt as I looked at those around me. My face told it all as my mouth opened but without speech, and my eyes were as wide open as the ptosis would allow.

Lunch found me in the main dining room, and at the table with three lovely ladies...Jackie, Dolly, and Norma. I introduced myself, high on the relationship of my chair (as yet unnamed, but with one in mind) and me, and not a fear in the world. Lunch was delicious, one lady declaring it was one of the best there had ever been, but the company was even better as two of the ladies and I discussed the nursing home since I was only here to await moving to Craighead. One of them had been here for seven years, and I forget the number of years the other one had been here. Both were here permanently. The third lady didn't talk to me, but watched me throughout my time at the table. I wondered what she was thinking of me.
After resting, my booty tired from sitting in my chair for so long, I went about with nervous energy, unpacking the sacks of my stuff, putting it into drawers until I had a real place to put it all, not really even knowing what all I had.

Supper was vegetable soup and a really delicious salad, and time with what I call my tablemates.
It had been an interesting day. I had talked to Heather (Admissions/Marketing) for quite a long while that morning. By that time I had already made friends, among whom were friends from my childhood, Ken (living just blocks from each other) and Dottie Yancey directly across the hall from me ;-). Experienced excellent nursing care. They could not have been ANY better. Same with the CNAs. Not only with their care of me, but as I watched them with the other residents. And no way could any other place be any cleaner than Skilcare. T

he morning light shines into my room, even the cloudy days still shedding a certain amount of brightness. I can make them out into cheerfulness, or the quiet peacefulness of a rainy day. I like those kind of days sometimes. Days of quiet reflection.
It felt so good here. What would I risk losing if I moved on to Craighead where I could not use my chair, where I would have to stay in bed until someone came to push me in a manual chair to wherever I wanted/needed to go. No. That is NOT me! In less than a day I had already made myself a member of this community, not a visitor, but a member. No way could I just pass through here. There were footprints on my heart already; I could not ignore them. I could not leave them. Yes. My mind was 99.9% settled. Stay at Skilcare Nursing Center. Craighead might have a nice exterior, but I know zilch about the inside, the nursing care, and such. Skilcare, I have first hand experience/exposure. I hadn't said anything to Jim just yet, but I do later on in the day (would have to check my text messages to find out exactly when but that really doesn't matter).

Though it is my decision, we both are in agreement this is a good, solid decision. As much as I like it here, and am SO very happy, what if I went to Craighead and found it unacceptable, where would I be? Absolutely no other option. I think, too, that I would be constantly comparing it with Skilcare. That in itself would lower its chances.
So. That is it. I am staying here at Skilcare. Now comes the moving IN, not on. Jim and the kids will be here today for a Mother's Day out tonight to Ruby Tuesday for RIBS, and I'll get ideas and opinions from them. I'm excited about the possibilities.

This is where I am this early Saturday moring. After some pain relief, breakfast with my tablemates awaits me. Coming back and getting dressed, then waiting for Jimbo and Donnie about midday. I am REALLY excited about their and Debbie's visit; I don't know when she will be coming over yet.

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