Sunday, May 3, 2009


Okay, so I did the thinking. Excited is how I feel. I mean, how else could I feel? New homes, site unseen were a way of life for me from 1962 when I got married until 1977 when we moved to Blytheville; we have been here ever since.

Things have been gearing up today for going to St. Elizabeth's (Ashley liked the name). I had my last pain shot this morning. Got my Foley put back in which has meant for an easier, drier, happier day... very nice.

No need to worry about anything; the rush, rush, hurry, hurry is just me whenever anything new or something changing is on the horizon. It's not a worry or concern like a 'scared', but more like a hurry up and get here, come on let's get this show on the road type of thing. Am I making sense? Hope you understand.

Son Jim has been so very reassuring. I really appreciate that. Don't think he believes me whenever I say I am not scared. But I'm not. I have faced the unknown of anticipated living conditions so many times. I always approached it with excitement, wonder, and oh, so many more feelings. I had to stay up-beat because I had three little kiddos who were being uprooted, and placed into a new environment every two years. Those are not moves across town, but across country, or half way across the world. The children do not remember any of this, though, even if images of our different living places are flashing before my eyes as I type.

At least I'm not having to worry (be bothered) about flying preparations, passports, etc., since I'll be going by ambulance. Not the most comfortable ride in town, but that's okay. Planes are not smooth anyway so I'm not missing anything there.

I don't have to worry about clothes. I'll just be moving from this bed, in this hospital gown, over to the gurney, and . . . now here is an unknown: what it will be like at the other end of the line. That is where the "excitement" comes in. Guess it stems from my adventuresome spirit. Something that gets me into trouble sometimes, but more often gives me courage to try new things.

So. That is where I come in with my feelings about moving to the nursing home, even without going home first. I believe this brings me around full circle to TRUST. Because of my trust in God, I can let go and be excited, feel excited. HE is in control.

Ragdoll is going with me, as well as some of her friends, one of whom is Penelope. See you later girls. Tomorrow is another day.


1 comment:

BettyB said...


My heart goes out to you and Jim. Being separated after all the years together must be difficult. Sending you healing thoughts and prayers that your days may get better and better.